5 Week Business Training in Mumbai

[JoosyJoos]

Hey guys,

So I've been assigned to business training for my new technology consulting job in Mumbai in June. I was just wondering if anyone has visited, lived there etc. and could give me a few tips on what there is to do, what to avoid, etc.

Should be an interesting experience to say the least... so help prepare me if you can!

Thanks

[Bimmer-Pilot]

Here's my tip don't go.............J/k
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[DevJ]

Originally Posted by JoosyJoos

Hey guys,

So I've been assigned to business training for my new technology consulting job in Mumbai in June. I was just wondering if anyone has visited, lived there etc. and could give me a few tips on what there is to do, what to avoid, etc.

Should be an interesting experience to say the least... so help prepare me if you can!

Thanks

That sucks..lol this is coming from an Indian. Watch out for the crooked ass customs officers. If they hassle you, give them a few ruppees. Believe me, it's worth it. Don't be shocked if you see many children beggars around the main streets, this is typical..be aware of shady ass Indians that could steal your shit also. Be careful of what you order at restaurants and what you eat. Also, if it's a shitty restaurant, check the bottle caps of the water bottles, sometimes those fucks glue the caps back on and fill them up with tap water.

Other than that, you should be fine. Try to enjoy the time you spend there.

[choicez]

Originally Posted by DevJ

That sucks..lol this is coming from an Indian. Watch out for the crooked ass customs officers. If they hassle you, give them a few ruppees. Believe me, it's worth it. Don't be shocked if you see many children beggars around the main streets, this is typical..be aware of shady ass Indians that could steal your shit also. Be careful of what you order at restaurants and what you eat. Also, if it's a shitty restaurant, check the bottle caps of the water bottles, sometimes those fucks glue the caps back on and fill them up with tap water.

Other than that, you should be fine. Try to enjoy the time you spend there.

Guess Slumdog Millionaire was on point...

[samwoo2go]

its dirty as shit, bums and thiefs everywhere. rude ass fuckers always hit you with their mopeds. All in all, a real piece of shit place, and I have been to some shitty places. It's really a disservice to India for it to be the financial capital of India.
DON'T give the kids anything, and I say that not to be me mean but once you do, they NEVER STOP COMING...in herds, and they get increasingly aggressive, getting their grubby little hands all over your shit, talking shit and spiting on you if you stop giving, and if you ever think about physically pushing them away, their "watchers" will jump out and beat the shit out of you. Then the cops will come investigate and if you don't pay them, you will get a second beating. Then the ambulance will come, and if you don't pay them, you will get a third beating and they will leave you there bleeding to death. Then the little street kids will come back and point and laugh at you, then proceed to piss on you for 1 final insult.
As you lay there on the streets of Mumbai covered with curry piss and bleeding to death, you will use your last ounce of energy to pull out you phone, get online, go to E90post/OT and reply here "I wish I didn't go to Mumbai..." that's when a 80 years old snake charmer comes over rubs some cow dung all over your face claiming it's spiritual medicine and takes your phone as "payment".

Have a good trip, don't drink the water bro.

[choicez]

[SoCali E36]

Originally Posted by samwoo2go

its dirty as shit, bums and thiefs everywhere. rude ass fuckers always hit you with their mopeds. All in all, a real piece of shit place, and I have been to some shitty places. It's really a disservice to India for it to be the financial capital of India.
DON'T give the kids anything, and I say that not to be me mean but once you do, they NEVER STOP COMING...in herds, and they get increasingly aggressive, getting their grubby little hands all over your shit, talking shit and spiting on you if you stop giving, and if you ever think about physically pushing them away, their "watchers" will jump out and beat the shit out of you. Then the cops will come investigate and if you don't pay them, you will get a second beating. Then the ambulance will come, and if you don't pay them, you will get a third beating and they will leave you there bleeding to death. Then the little street kids will come back and point and laugh at you, then proceed to piss on you for 1 final insult.
As you lay there on the streets of Mumbai covered with curry piss and bleeding to death, you will use your last ounce of energy to pull out you phone, get online, go to E90post/OT and reply here "I wish I didn't go to Mumbai..." that's when a 80 years old snake charmer comes over rubs some cow dung all over your face claiming it's spiritual medicine and takes your phone as "payment".

Have a good trip, don't drink the water bro.

[JayKay335i]

Don't forget the pepto.

[Peanuto]

What Samwoo said. Think of the beggars as whores and watchers pimps. They send the kids out to beg, and the kids return and give the money to the watchers in return for shelter/food etc... The money is really going to their sleazy begging pimp, who when he can afford it, will hire a shitty street doctor to cut a kid's arm off so he gets more sympathy from people and thus more money.

[wwjbd24]

it's gonna be monsoon season, right? good luck, from an indian who frequents mumbai

[jeveryday]

Heard nothing but great things about that place.

[immiketoo]

Originally Posted by samwoo2go

its dirty as shit, bums and thiefs everywhere. rude ass fuckers always hit you with their mopeds. All in all, a real piece of shit place, and I have been to some shitty places. It's really a disservice to India for it to be the financial capital of India.
DON'T give the kids anything, and I say that not to be me mean but once you do, they NEVER STOP COMING...in herds, and they get increasingly aggressive, getting their grubby little hands all over your shit, talking shit and spiting on you if you stop giving, and if you ever think about physically pushing them away, their "watchers" will jump out and beat the shit out of you. Then the cops will come investigate and if you don't pay them, you will get a second beating. Then the ambulance will come, and if you don't pay them, you will get a third beating and they will leave you there bleeding to death. Then the little street kids will come back and point and laugh at you, then proceed to piss on you for 1 final insult.
As you lay there on the streets of Mumbai covered with curry piss and bleeding to death, you will use your last ounce of energy to pull out you phone, get online, go to E90post/OT and reply here "I wish I didn't go to Mumbai..." that's when a 80 years old snake charmer comes over rubs some cow dung all over your face claiming it's spiritual medicine and takes your phone as "payment".

Have a good trip, don't drink the water bro.

That's the funniest thing you've ever said!

[blue2fire]

No hookers.
Dont drink the water.
Dont eat the food unless it is from a respectable establishment.
Dont visit crowded tourist hotspots (they seem to have a problem with terrorists who try to blow up foreigners)
Dont use public transport, fun for the first minute but it wears off (Dont drive/ hire a car with the driver)

Take a raincoat. You will be damp and uncomfortable all the time.

Should be fun, i liked it.

[chungdae]

My family and I went there several years back. We stayed for four days and decided to cut our trip short; VERY short. While we were walking around a market place, a man on a bicycle cycled to my mom and tried to snatch her necklace. My father caught him in mid snatch. My father is a ninth degree black belt in Judo and a black belt in six other martial arts. That was the first time I have ever seen a grown man cry.

[akack79]

Watch Slumdog Millionaire if you haven't already.

[NYCGarbagePrince]

Screw pepto... be smart get immodium AD.. that way you can eat whatever you want and keep taking it until you find a decent place to shit.... and believe me they will be few and far between. But most of all have fun!

[Peanuto]

Originally Posted by NYCGarbagePrince

Screw pepto... be smart get immodium AD.. that way you can eat whatever you want and keep taking it until you find a decent place to shit.... and believe me they will be few and far between. But most of all have fun!

This is how I have survived Mexico and Costa Rica

[NYCGarbagePrince]

I did a month in South East Asia. Cambodia, Laos, Vietnam, Thailand.. and then a few weeks in China. I brought a couple bottles of the stuff. The other people I was with begged me for it. I laughed while they were forced to wipe their ass with their socks... Nothing is more shocking than being in a "bathroom" in thailand and seeing a bucket a hole and a hose. I remember saying to myself, I can wait a little bit longer and popped another immodium AD. I love asian curry but... I mean damn it can get painful unless you take proper precautions. Your ass can get downright RAW if you don't know what you are getting yourself into. Match the food up with a steady stream of alcohol and you will find yourself in a world of pain.

[Peanuto]

Don't drink too much on the immodium diet though. You're body wont handle the "toxins" in the alcohol well and won't let it out of your system properly. It gives new meaning to hangovers.

[JoosyJoos]

This sounds like a blast so far lol... what a way to launch a career.

[dth656]

if you work for an infosy, wipro, TCS or similar large company, i wouldn't worry too much. they will prolly keep everyone on-site on one of their campuses, where you'll basically be in a bubble (nice hotel, western food available, relatively clean, a/c, etc), and any visits off campus will be company managed 'field trips'.

[Kroy]

Originally Posted by dth656

if you work for an infosy, wipro, TCS or similar large company, i wouldn't worry too much. they will prolly keep everyone on-site on one of their campuses, where you'll basically be in a bubble (nice hotel, western food available, relatively clean, a/c, etc), and any visits off campus will be company managed 'field trips'.

lol that sounds like heaven compared to what everyone else is describing. Hope for OP's sake he gets the bubble.