Why not go ahead and get if for her if that doesn't present a financial hardship? My wife had her heart set on a Z4M last year and had an SUV prior to that. Never was much of a driver, but knew she wanted something small and very quick with good handling.
A little less than a year latter and her driving skills have improved immeasurably. A car control clinic started the improvement and now she goes driving with me and my buddies on "spirited drives" all the time and has no trouble keeping up or even leading. Next step, which with work and other things have gotten in the way of the past few months, are DEs and other performance skills improvement activities. Not because
I want her to but because
she wants to.
She can tell you pretty much anything you want to know about that car, suspension mods, alignment, tire options, quirks, things to watch for, mods (doesn't care about cosmetic mods, just performance ones). Has taken to indoor cart activities as well. Gifts? Jewelry? Clothes? Nope--why do that when she'd rather have coils?
Can tell if the alignment is off my a hair just by how the car drives....She's turned into a "car enthusiast" and we're off so see some ALMS racing this year. And I never get any grief about mods I want to do. My buddies all wish their wives were into cars like mine is--and really respect the fact she can actually
drive. And while it's not an M3 it's hardly made her "cocky". In fact, she's quite humble about the car/herself as she knows just how much work goes into being a capable driver.
My point is you never know where these things can lead. Not many women seem to approach the same level of interest in driving/cars as guys do, but then again give the right car to the right woman and you may end up with a shared passion. Which I've got to tell you is a hell of a lot of fun! Did I mention there's no "you're spending too much time/money/effort" on that car/driving? That's priceless....