[Follow-up]
Hello and happy new year!
I have a late but bittersweet update that may or may not help anyone experiencing the same/similar issue. Since the time of the post I've been tired of running around diagnosing the car so I did what I felt like I should have done in the first place. I took my car to my local BMW dealership and noted the self diagnosis that the battery is not charging and the alternator is damaged/weak. In response, BMW replaced my alternator and battery for OEM ones, coded and registered the new battery and the problem stopped. The job took a day to complete and about $2200 for the entire job and a 2 year warranty on the parts. Despite the cost, I had a piece of mind and a fun car to enjoy until the winter hit.
As far as the recalls go, I did have an open recall two months prior to my op. The recall was to replace a positive battery cable behind the fuse box that seemed to have the exact symptoms my car was experiencing. After the recall service, there was no difference to my problem. I still recommend checking the recall status of your own car and getting that resolved anyways. It won't be a hit to your pockets because it is free of charge!
Unrelated to the topic, less than 500 miles later I had a rod bearing spin.
