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Everyone here is going to tell you something different but I was in the same boat as you about a year ago. Looking at 09+ E90 M3's with things in mind that I really wanted. I ended up getting an 08 E90 with 18k miles (21.5k now) and dont at all regret it. The same problems that float around this board happen in all years and different miles. Check out the High mileage 08's check in thread and you will see any major problems are few and far in between. With that said Def get a 6MT unless you like your sports car to drive for you...lol
Good luck and welcome!!
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