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I think it's important that you know exactly what you think would be a fair compromise (eg. a 5% bump now, formal title change, and a program for evaluating future increases?) and what you're prepared to do if the answer's no.
If you're going to have this conversation, you also need to be prepared to walk away if you get nothing out of it. From the way you describe it above, you feel undervalued and are becoming disengaged/disenfranchised. To me, that means staying with the status quo is not a viable option so if you meet rejection or minimal responsiveness ... are you prepared to walk? If not, don't even start the conversation ... nothing worse than a bluff.
By walk, I don't mean storm out of the place and quit. Rather, make your mind up to leave and diligently pursue new opportunities until the right one comes up.
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