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      12-16-2011, 10:28 AM   #1
john9
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Topic: Christmas Wish List (Twisted Style)

Basically it goes like this...

1. Each person responding grants that wish of the person they are responding to; but your granting their wish must be a bit twisted in nature.
2. You make a wish.

Example:
Person 1:
I wish for a million dollars.

Person 2:
I grant your wish and you now have a million dollars... But you live on a deserted island with no one around and nothing to buy.

I wish for a hot wife.

Person 3:
You have your hot wife now... But she leaves you for your son.

I wish for a Corvette.

Please keep your responses clean... But have fun with it.


I'll get us started...


I wish for a Corvette for Christmas.
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      12-16-2011, 11:27 AM   #2
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You get a Corvette for Christmas but you total it within the first 5 minutes of driving it.

I wish to get laid tonight.
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      12-16-2011, 11:36 AM   #3
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hahah Funny! Okay, i'll bite. You'll get laid tonight, but it'll be a transvestite.

I wish to get ESS V1 Supercharger kit for my M3.
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      12-16-2011, 01:01 PM   #4
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You get your ESS kit, but will never have anyone who can install it for you; it'll just sit in your garage.

I wish for a vacation in Japan and other parts of Asia.
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      12-16-2011, 01:44 PM   #5
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You will get your vacation in asia but not before your plane crashes into the ocean first.

i wish it didnt burn when i pee
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      12-16-2011, 02:55 PM   #6
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You no longer feel burning when you pee but now you agree to actively take part in bone marrow transplants for a few years

I wish I could just get accepted into dental school and never finish undergrad
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      12-16-2011, 02:58 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shazzy04 View Post
You no longer feel burning when you pee but now you agree to actively take part in bone marrow transplants for a few years

I wish I could just get accepted into dental school and never finish undergrad
You get accepted into dental school, you graduate and get hit with a malpractice suit for 100's of thousands by your first patient.

I wish for a Nissan Gtr!
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      12-16-2011, 03:38 PM   #8
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You get a Nissan GTR but its only a hotwheels


I want a rich husband
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      12-16-2011, 03:52 PM   #9
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You get your rich husband, but he is 5'5 with a 2" penis. He snores loudly, addicted to hookers, blow, and has a hell of an attorney and pre-nup.


I want school to be over.
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      12-16-2011, 04:00 PM   #10
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you get school to be over, but your parents and grandparents get to judge you over christmas break nonstop

i want UGR 458 italia TT
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      12-16-2011, 10:47 PM   #11
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You get your 458 italia TT but total it right out the lot ( you're safe)

I want to go snowboarding down mount everest.
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      12-16-2011, 11:38 PM   #12
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You get to snowboard down Mount Everest, but run over one of the preserved dead bodies that was never able to be recovered due to harsh weather.

I wish for another tattoo.
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      12-16-2011, 11:59 PM   #13
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U get a tattoo, come to find out u got a butterfly on ur lower back..

I want a ...............!
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      12-17-2011, 12:37 AM   #14
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You get a ..........! But it ........! and you can't ......... ever again without .........!

I want to be a professional ALMS race driver for Flying Lizards team.
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      12-17-2011, 01:16 AM   #15
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You can be ALMS driver but you only get to drive 5hp go-karts


I want a Bugatti
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      12-17-2011, 01:18 AM   #16
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Quote:
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You can be ALMS driver but you only get to drive 5hp go-karts


I want a Bugatti
you get a bugatti but you drive it into a lake and have millions of people on the interwebs call you by names and your known as that guy who drove his bugatti into the lake.

I want to start work and get out of college..
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      12-17-2011, 01:22 AM   #17
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Quote:
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you get a bugatti but you drive it into a lake and have millions of people on the interwebs call you by names and your known as that guy who drove his bugatti into the lake.

I want to start work and get out of college..
You can start work but the next day you get fired for sexually harassing another man



I want my daughter to learn her colors and number before new years
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      12-17-2011, 01:32 AM   #18
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your daughter learns colors and numbers tomorrow, but she no longer thinks you're her father


I want to go on vacation
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      12-17-2011, 01:45 AM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shazzy04 View Post
your daughter learns colors and numbers tomorrow, but she no longer thinks you're her father


I want to go on vacation
You go on vacation but bring home an interesting new disease.

I want better presents than last year
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      12-17-2011, 02:04 AM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brey335i View Post
You go on vacation but bring home an interesting new disease.

I want better presents than last year
You get better presents but they all contain some form of a newly contractible std

I want my girlfriend to sleep more in the mornings on days off so I can as well.
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      12-17-2011, 02:25 AM   #21
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your girlfriend gets to sleep more so you can as well, but she decides to adopt two cats who make it their business to watch you have sex from a mere 2 feet away.

i wish for my family to not bother me about religion this holiday season.
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      12-17-2011, 02:55 AM   #22
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Your family does indeed stop bothering you about religion.. But hire a dime chick to the job and get you to accept Islam.

I wish to one day catch a fly with chopsticks
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