Looking for "THE" exhaust.

[LateBraking]

Hey guys, my name is Incapibull O. Searchins. I was hoping you guys could help me find "THE" exhaust.

Basically my criteria is as follows: it must be a full system that is made out of pure fucking Mithril, weigh less than the very thought of existence itself, be more indestructible than Superman (but I'll settle for the mother fucking moon), sound like the PERFECT combination of the following (no exceptions!)-(exotic, Ferarri-ish, F1-ish, musclecar-ish, brute-ish, tame-ish, refined-ish, raspy-ish, not raspy-ish), must be so fucking loud that people think my cock is abnormally large (or think I'm an abnormally large cock, same difference), yet must not attract any type of law enforcement, and must not drone AT ALL IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM or else the baby on board sticker on my window will get all fucking offended, must look more gorgeous than Aphrodite herself, must add enough power that the total sum horsepower number could be used as a defibrillator for the fucking sun, must be 51 states emissions compliant (I added a state for my unusually large amount of ignorance), must make it so that the CEL for my car never comes on, even for a completely unrelated part, and the subsonic frequencies from the exhaust must make womens' panties drop every time I rev the motor and do retarded burnouts in the parking lot. Oh, I'm on a budget, so it's gotta be like, $up3r ch33p! I'm too cool to use paragraphs so if you don't like it then fuck you, and now after I said fuck you like the internet badass that I am, I'm going to have the arrogance to lick your balls and ask you for help. HELP ME FIND "THE" EXHAUST GUYS LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!

And now, I'm going back to work. Happy Labor Day everyone, hope you all are enjoying your day off.

And really people, sarcasm aside, we have an exhaust overview thread stickied in this part of the forum. Why people cannot click the link or use the forum's search feature is baffling to me.

http://www.m3post.com/forums/showthread.php?t=165145

EDIT: The truth just dawned on me like a brilliant idea from a crackhead snorting a mountain of pure concentrated cocaine - clearly this exhaust is the BMW Performance Exhaust. Delivered to you by the gods (BMW) themselves, inconel, titanium, laser-etched ///M logo for the paltry sum of 5 grand (around 3.5 if you're capable enough of the fucking epic feat of searching Tisher's website)....holy $#!t it's pure tits....

[哇靠~M3]

at least u posted in the right section.

[LateBraking]

Originally Posted by WaSai.M3

at least u posted in the right section.

Damn, I forgot about that!

[aajami]

You also used proper punctuation. Suspension of disbelief has been shattered!

[Crazy Bimmer]

Holy shit, this crossed my mind today as well.

Most of these exhaust is purely for sound, if there is any power increase between them then im sure its hardly noticeable. Not including HFC or titanium exhausts.

Buy the exhaust that sounds the best to you. Simple!

Oh while we at it, dont ask ME what color car you should be driving.

[henryyxyu]

just slap on a few vtec decals. adds more hp and torque than any other exhaust. plus, when that vtec kicks in that sound is just and kicks in harder than a turbo. also, thinking of the weight advantage!!!! why bother with heavy 50 pound exhaust systems crafted from the finest exotic metals when you can get a stick made of vinyl for 5 cents and get better benefits

people these day

[duk]

don't forget an akimoto intake and brospeed headers

[powertrip]

You're looking for the Akra ....sorry couldn't resist .

[ModBargains II]

You're looking for the Ericsson Amuse setup! :P

[LateBraking]

Originally Posted by aajami

You also used proper punctuation. Suspension of disbelief has been shattered!

Originally Posted by powertrip

You're looking for the Akra ....sorry couldn't resist .

Akra isn't badass enough. According to the threads on M3post, it only turns exhaust fumes into plutonium. That's just not cool enough!

Originally Posted by Crazy Bimmer

Oh while we at it, dont ask ME what color car you should be driving.

I love it when this question comes up....We should totally start a thread about this next.

[DevJ]

Love this thread.. lol

[osteome]

To think that I almost did not bother to open this thread...too funny!

[MikeM5]

+1 to the OP. Looking to break 500hp, but still stay NA. If you could also provide dynos that would be great. Will this void my warranty?

Also, do you guys think that the M3 is high class?

[ooowowizstev]

LOL.

[signes]

Originally Posted by iBeJayKaying

Hey guys, my name is Incapibull O. Searchins. I was hoping you guys could help me find "THE" exhaust.

Basically my criteria is as follows: it must be a full system that is made out of pure fucking Mithril, weigh less than the very thought of existence itself...

LMFAO! Bonus points for creativity and fictitious element references... Though one major omission, you forgot to refer to yourself in the 3rd person in the thread title. ibejaykaying's looking for the uuuuuuuuuuuuultimate exhaust yo!

Post of the Month

[shawshank772]

So, what one do you all think is the best fit to his needs? I am curious as well.

[Sleeper519]

You forgot about tips...

yo, does anyone make like 120mm tips in stealth-bomber-black that also blocks radar signals from behind.

[Eurotrash8]

Sticky

[Chako]

so whats your guys thoughts on 335i vs m3?

[Poleposition]

Very funny thread. Thread of month for sure.

[nerweezyTA]

Originally Posted by Poleposition

Very funny thread. Thread of month for sure.

lol +1

[LateBraking]

[16:01] itsstevensbox: where is ur exhaust anyway?
[16:01] itsstevensbox: at ur house or at rennspec?
[16:01] ibejaykaying: which?
[16:01] itsstevensbox: akra
[16:01] ibejaykaying: THE exhaust is on the fucking moon
[16:01] ibejaykaying: oh
[16:01] ibejaykaying: akra is at my house
[16:01] ibejaykaying: cuz it sucks.
[16:01] ibejaykaying: THE EXHAUST is better.
[16:01] itsstevensbox: wut
[16:01] itsstevensbox: ohh
[16:01] itsstevensbox: no not that 1
[16:01] ibejaykaying: yes
[16:01] ibejaykaying: that 1
[16:01] ibejaykaying: i found it
[16:01] ibejaykaying: but it was a compromise
[16:01] ibejaykaying: it was made out of fucking palladium
[16:02] itsstevensbox: lighter than the very thought of existence
[16:02] ibejaykaying: the dwarves of mordor ran out of mythril.
[16:02] itsstevensbox: lolol
[16:02] ibejaykaying: i was so pissed
[16:02] itsstevensbox: + a lil bit of kryptonite
[16:02] itsstevensbox: gotta beat superman with it..