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      12-18-2006, 02:01 AM   #1
jontran
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what would u do?

i have a good friend and known her for 2 years.she have 2 kids a 5 and a 1 year old.im starting to like her and i dont know if i should go for it or not.she is 24 and 1 year older than me.if u were me, would u go for it? is the kids going to cause our relationship if i get with her? if anyone been thru what i am going thru, please tell me how it is.i am asian and dont know if that matter?
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      12-18-2006, 02:18 AM   #2
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If you really love her, you will accept the fact that she has 2 kids. Personally, I would not get involved with someone that has kids, unless I really really loved her.
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      12-18-2006, 02:39 AM   #3
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love doesnt have age requirements unless your 30 and shes 15... then you have a problem there.
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      12-18-2006, 02:56 AM   #4
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Pics of girl will be required for us to properly assess this situation for you.
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      12-18-2006, 03:14 AM   #5
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the problem is not if you like her....

it's if SHE likes YOU.....

if she doens't like u....then even if she's freakin hot and has no children......it won't matter to u.....

but if she likes u....and u like her.....then u 2 are already in a loving relationship....and everything in this world is not a problem...

things are simple if you don't think too complicated.....
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      12-18-2006, 03:22 AM   #6
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as for the pic, i dont want to post pic without permission and i dont want to ask if i can post her pic because im asking this type of question.but i would rate her 9/10. i rarely rate anyone 9/10.as for she liking me or not, that i dont know for sure because i never confess to her.but i think she like me(9/10 times im right). those vibe where u know that someone like u or not.but i am holding back right now, dont know if i should keep going on and get with her.everytime i think about getting with her i start thinking about the 2 kids.
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      12-18-2006, 03:53 AM   #7
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If the fact that she has kids bothers you, I would not get with her because it will just bother you more once you get into a serious relationship.
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      12-18-2006, 04:44 AM   #8
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avoid putting yourself in situations where you dont have to be in. if you can. however, the decision is still yours.

consider the kids real father. what are you and them gonna do if the father comes back?

if you enter the relationship i think you're gonna face some tough issues sooner or later. i think a working relationship should not be full of stress. just my 2 cents.
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      12-18-2006, 05:13 AM   #9
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If you really like/love this girl then you have to start to like the kids as well. If kids are going to be a problem for you then you should scrap this girl out of your mind. I personally wouldn't want to get myself into a relationship where the kids aren't mine, unless of course i love the girl very much.
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      12-18-2006, 06:34 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jontran
i have a good friend and known her for 2 years.she have 2 kids a 5 and a 1 year old.im starting to like her and i dont know if i should go for it or not.she is 24 and 1 year older than me.if u were me, would u go for it? is the kids going to cause our relationship if i get with her? if anyone been thru what i am going thru, please tell me how it is.i am asian and dont know if that matter?
Just remember that she comes with the kids. They will always be part of her.

So long as you don't see that as a negative and so long as you want to be with her then you should go for it.
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      12-18-2006, 08:26 AM   #11
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I have no opinion here. Is she asian too?
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      12-18-2006, 08:38 AM   #12
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I'm 24 as well, and honestly I couldn't do it.
Not to say you can't or shouldn't... just giving my point of view.
Understand that her kids will always come first. Also, it'd be good to know how involved the kid's father(s) is/are. Are you looking for a short-term gf? If so, walk away, the kids will just complicate that issue. If you're looking for something long term, keep in mind you may become a father figure to her children.
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      12-18-2006, 08:49 AM   #13
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+1
and I've gotta say, guys have no six sense, girls can tell if a guy likes her or not by feeling the vibe, not the same for guys, guys' six sense is pretty dull

Quote:
Originally Posted by ChineseGuy
the problem is not if you like her....

it's if SHE likes YOU.....

if she doens't like u....then even if she's freakin hot and has no children......it won't matter to u.....

but if she likes u....and u like her.....then u 2 are already in a loving relationship....and everything in this world is not a problem...

things are simple if you don't think too complicated.....
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      12-18-2006, 08:51 AM   #14
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Just make sure you dont get used to be the baby daddy. Just curious but are the 2 kids from one dad or two? If two, I'd run for the hills.
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      12-18-2006, 09:12 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by canucklion
guys have no six sense
what is six sense? rest my case
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      12-18-2006, 09:40 AM   #16
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you're still young, no point in complicating your life too much this early by getting into a relationship with a woman with kids. there are too many hot women out there to tie yourself down to one who doesn't put you in the best situation possible.
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      12-18-2006, 09:47 AM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by canucklion
+1
and I've gotta say, guys have no six sense, girls can tell if a guy likes her or not by feeling the vibe, not the same for guys, guys' six sense is pretty dull
What do you mean no sixth sense?!!!! I see dead people all the time
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      12-18-2006, 09:52 AM   #18
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I agree with all the people giving you the kids' angle. If you just want her and not her kids then it won't work. You need to realize that if you go for it, you're taking the entire package and you're gonna have to be a father figure / role model / care-giver to her kids. Are you prepared to grow up quickly and take that responsibility? If not, then don't bother... your situation will quickly die with her if she realizes that her kids are going to be a problem with you.
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      12-18-2006, 09:56 AM   #19
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IMO, she had a kid when she was 19.. Doesn't seem like the brightest bulb in the lot..

My advice:
Run. Fast. You're 23..
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      12-18-2006, 10:00 AM   #20
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to be more prcise, it's 'women's intuition', never heard of 'men's intuition' have you?
Quote:
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What do you mean no sixth sense?!!!! I see dead people all the time
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      12-18-2006, 10:22 AM   #21
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at least you know she puts out.
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      12-18-2006, 10:31 AM   #22
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get outta there, bro. nowadays, it's just not practical to get involved with women who has kids. you're starting to like her probably because you guys always talk and hang out. you might just be feeling sorry for her because of her situation and that could lead to an erroneous decision that you will truly regret later on. it is a very complicated matter. you're young, don't be in a hurry. trust me, you will find somebody more worthy of your attention. good luck.
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