Top Gear Video: E92 M3 ZCP vs Audi RS5

[masamune]

Is there another video link? YT deleted it.

[Max74]

http://www.streetfire.net/video/bmw-...s5_2203263.htm

[Leg]

God - "Hi, what happened to you then?"
AudiRS5owner - "Err, I crashed"
God - "Understeered into a tree did you?"
AudiRS5owner - "Err, yeah"
God - "Bear with me a second, Hi, M3 owner?"
M3 Owner - "Yeah"
God - "Nice spin mate, little less throttle next time, looked great though, good way to go, like your style"
M3 Owner - "Ta"
God - "No worries, I'm an RWD man myself (and 6MT, why do you think I gave humans left legs!) in you go. The women are on the left as you go in. Now then, RS5 man"
AudiRS5owner - "Yeah, well it just kinda didnt turn and just well, its a bit embarrassing cos I was chasing him you just let in, and well, it just, look it had quattro, I thought I would be fine, but it just carried going straight on so I give it some beans to flick the back into line and well, that made it even worse"
God frowns
AudiRS5owner - "You're not letting me in are you?"
God - "Would you?"
AudiRS5owner - "No, not really, quattro is a sin then is it?"
God - "Not strictly, we have a few R8 and RS4 owners in here"
AudiRS5owner (perks up) - "Any RS5 owners?"
God - "hahahaha....NO!"
AudiRS5owner - "I'll be off then"
God - "Next"
2nd M3 owner- "Hi, err, I pressed the DSC button in the wet and then there was this tree, what happened?"
God - "You pressed the Death Suicide Crash button? In the wet? In you go. Next"

Disclaimer - In no way should this transcript be taken as evidence of God's existance. The poster does not condone religion nor support it. The views expressed above are not those of the poster. Any similarity to real persons or all powerful beings is purely coincidental. God is a registered trademark of many disparate religions that mostly agree that there probably is a God but that his (or her) name, views, message, expectation of the human race, message differs. Different Gods may have varying views on BMW, Audi, RWD, Quattro and Manual Gearboxes. May contain nuts. The poster does not believe a word of it but its all true, none of it, except some bits, sometimes, but not today.

[shiggy]

Originally Posted by Leg

God - "Hi, what happened to you then?"
AudiRS5owner - "Err, I crashed"
God - "Understeered into a tree did you?"
AudiRS5owner - "Err, yeah"
God - "Bear with me a second, Hi, M3 owner?"
M3 Owner - "Yeah"
God - "Nice spin mate, little less throttle next time, looked great though, good way to go, like your style"
M3 Owner - "Ta"
God - "No worries, I'm an RWD man myself (and 6MT, why do you think I gave humans left legs!) in you go. The women are on the left as you go in. Now then, RS5 man"
AudiRS5owner - "Yeah, well it just kinda didnt turn and just well, its a bit embarrassing cos I was chasing him you just let in, and well, it just, look it had quattro, I thought I would be fine, but it just carried going straight on so I give it some beans to flick the back into line and well, that made it even worse"
God frowns
AudiRS5owner - "You're not letting me in are you?"
God - "Would you?"
AudiRS5owner - "No, not really, quattro is a sin then is it?"
God - "Not strictly, we have a few R8 and RS4 owners in here"
AudiRS5owner (perks up) - "Any RS5 owners?"
God - "hahahaha....NO!"
AudiRS5owner - "I'll be off then"
God - "Next"
2nd M3 owner- "Hi, err, I pressed the DSC button in the wet and then there was this tree, what happened?"
God - "You pressed the Death Suicide Crash button? In the wet? In you go. Next"

ring ring ring:

"hi there...can I speak to audi Fanboi please"?

"why hello good man...this is audi fan boi...feeling really perky today...how can I help you"?

"ummmm...ya..ok....well....I just called to see if you had seen the Top gear episode with the M3 vs the RS5"

"oh yes I did....I just loved how pretty the interior looked in the RS5...you know it has such beautiful seats"!!!

"Ya...I guess so....but dont you think the ending was a bit of a surprised...the M3 beat it by a full second....and on a wet track"!

"dreadful it was....but at least the RS5 is exclusive"!!!

"sure...I guess so......but I think you might be confusing the lack of sales because its so damn expensive and cars that are cheaper are beating it in every comparo"

"you are beginning to ruffle my feathers mister....the RS5 has the latest in Quattro..cant beat AWD mate"

"well...it sure didnt perform that well on the wet track and it still suffers from massive understeer and it plows around corners like a '72 Buick"

"PISS ON YOU...YOU GO TO HELL AND DIE!!!....IT HAS QUATTRO AND REALLY REALLY PRETTY INTERIOR AND AND AND IT UMMM ....ITS EXCLUSIVE...AND AND ITS AWD....AND IT HAS REALLY COOL LOOKING CAMARO MAGS ON IT....AND HAS L.E.D. TWINKLY LIGHTS"

"easy little fella....im sorry....I didnt mean to get you so upset..i understand you are the Audi expert...so I just wanted to hear your opinions on the latest RS5 vs M3 comparo"

"I....I think......I think it was fixed...the comparo was supervised by a secret agency....and ummm....Top Gear was told to make the RS5 understeer like a Mac Truck and only go 3/4 throddle.....IT'S A CONSPIRICY...SHHHHHHH...i HAVE TO GO NOW...THEY MAY BE LISTENING"

there you have it folks...that was an excerpt from a phone call to an Audi insider......all M3 vs RS5 have been fixed!!!
The understeer, the numb steering feel.....the plowing and nose dive in cornering...the massive weight...the all new Quattro system failing to astonish the world.....ALL lies....a massive cover up!
I know all of you are shocked...but you must keep this on the down low or the government may be knocking at your door!!!
ssssshhhhhhhhhhhhh.........

[BMRLVR]

Come on footie, equal number of wins each..... that is bullshit.

BMW seems to have a firm grasp on how to build cars that drivers and journalists love. Face it every car manufacturer is always trying to build cars to beat the BMW 3 series. If you go by number of comparison test wins and awards it is the most heralded car in the sport sedan/coupe world.

I am not being a BMW fanboy but facts are facts and I have seen far more magazine tests and auto shows where the BMW 3 series (M3 included) has been voted best compared to any other car period.

I like Audi's and VW's and have owned lots of them but be honest, regardless of your personal opinion BMW's are better reviewed/more accoladed than Audi's. The RS5 is an amazing car with an amazing engine, amazing interior and great looks but I think it is a letdown compared to what it was expected to be. In my opinion the RS4 was a much better car than this RS5, it did what it was supposed to do, beat the E46 M3 at it's own game!

[Brosef]

Originally Posted by BMRLVR

Come on footie, equal number of wins each..... that is bullshit.

BMW seems to have a firm grasp on how to build cars that drivers and journalists love. Face it every car manufacturer is always trying to build cars to beat the BMW 3 series. If you go by number of comparison test wins and awards it is the most heralded car in the sport sedan/coupe world.

I am not being a BMW fanboy but facts are facts and I have seen far more magazine tests and auto shows where the BMW 3 series (M3 included) has been voted best compared to any other car period.

I like Audi's and VW's and have owned lots of them but be honest, regardless of your personal opinion BMW's are better reviewed/more accoladed than Audi's. The RS5 is an amazing car with an amazing engine, amazing interior and great looks but I think it is a letdown compared to what it was expected to be. In my opinion the RS4 was a much better car than this RS5, it did what it was supposed to do, beat the E46 M3 at it's own game!

My thoughts exactly. I wouldnt hold your breath waiting to hear footie admit defeat - he seems to think he's clever at changing the topic.

[footie]

Originally Posted by BMRLVR

Come on footie, equal number of wins each..... that is bullshit.

BMW seems to have a firm grasp on how to build cars that drivers and journalists love. Face it every car manufacturer is always trying to build cars to beat the BMW 3 series. If you go by number of comparison test wins and awards it is the most heralded car in the sport sedan/coupe world.

I am not being a BMW fanboy but facts are facts and I have seen far more magazine tests and auto shows where the BMW 3 series (M3 included) has been voted best compared to any other car period.

I like Audi's and VW's and have owned lots of them but be honest, regardless of your personal opinion BMW's are better reviewed/more accoladed than Audi's. The RS5 is an amazing car with an amazing engine, amazing interior and great looks but I think it is a letdown compared to what it was expected to be. In my opinion the RS4 was a much better car than this RS5, it did what it was supposed to do, beat the E46 M3 at it's own game!

Well you see there is your problem and mistake, I didn't refer to the number of wins in a comparison test between the M3 and RS5, no I was refering to lap times and in this case the number of wins between them is roughly even.

At no point EVER have I claimed the RS5 being a more entertaining drive, it's rwd that makes the M3 the superior driver's car. AWD claim to fame is it's easier to drive quickly (read 90% of us), it's more stable and has superior traction.

Each have their appeal and each have their fans.

[shiggy]

Originally Posted by footie

Well you see there is your problem and mistake, I didn't refer to the number of wins in a comparison test between the M3 and RS5, no I was refering to lap times and in this case the number of wins between them is roughly even.

At no point EVER have I claimed the RS5 being a more entertaining drive, it's rwd that makes the M3 the superior driver's car. AWD claim to fame is it's easier to drive quickly (read 90% of us), it's more stable and has superior traction.

Each have their appeal and each have their fans.

I beg to differ....and it sure didnt appear to be the case in the video as well....
AWD gives the driver a false sense of security....AWD is severely over rated and so are Audi's.
the RS5 has more horsepower...the all new Quattro system....and it has failed to beat the M3 on a WET track!...astonishing really isnt it?!!!!

I guess your rebuttal would be: "OH YA...the RS5 would kick the crap out of the M3 on a snowy track"....unfortunately that will be the first and only win the RS5 will have over the M3.

[footie]

Shiggy, I will only reply to you again when you make a worthwhile post. Not this time, sorry.

[shiggy]

I was not looking for a reply....we can predict what your replies will be anyway...I just stated a fact....and ill state another....the m3 beat the RS5.....AGAIN!
can we move back to topic please?!
I'll start: that video was great!!.....the RS5 sure looked its weight..especially through the corners....it looked like a fat chick on a skateboard going thru turns!
all kidding aside...I think Audi should refocus and start challenging Infiniti and Lexus instead of BMW....
They have always been a company who puts down the competition in its marketing campaigns (which is the number one rule of what not to do in sales) and if they target the japanese brands...at least they have a chance and not look like idiots after each new model release!
just my 1.02 cents worth.
Peace....

[shiggy]

here are some great quotes from several journalists regarding the RS5 and M3:
Autoweek: "If you want the best in the class, Its definitely the M3!"
Sub Zero (a member of this forum): "...just come to terms with what the RS5 is and not what you want it to be."
Car and Driver: the RS5:..But a bigger problem was that we simply could not find steering satisfaction. In dynamic mode, the helm felt far too quick and eager to bite into corners; dialing it back to the comfort setting kept the steering light on-center, but when effort finally arrived, it came in too late and too abruptly. Auto mode put the steering somewhere between too fast and too artificial.
Car and Driver: There’s a lot to love about the RS5. If the two other cars weren’t around, the gorgeous new Audi would surely feel like a winner and might better justify its $90,000 (estimated) price. But alongside the better-balanced and more involving CTS-V and M3, the RS5 can make the driver feel more like a passenger.
Car and Driver: "And, while its engine (M3) may be marginally louder than the others, this 4.0-liter V-8 sounds like it should have prancing horses stamped on it".
Shiggy: M3...Fook ya!!!....still king...still the benchmark"
Audi: "damn...back to the drawing board....AGAIN"

[footie]

Originally Posted by shiggy

Car and Driver: "And, while its engine (M3) may be marginally louder than the others, this 4.0-liter V-8 sounds like it should have prancing horses stamped on it"

This is why I ignore Car and Driver reports, their lack of general car knowledge is amazing, a BMW v8 sounds like a Ferrari flat-plane crank v8 their respective sound from these engines are a world apart that no car enthusiast worth their salt would never mistake them.

[technik330]

The e9x M3 is the greatest car on the planet mentality... check

Loads of, ignorant, anything non-M3 haters posting... check

Logged on to WhySoInsecurePost.com... check



I love this forum, it's comprised of overly fragile egos and lots of hot air.

[BMRLVR]

Originally Posted by footie

This is why I ignore Car and Driver reports, their lack of general car knowledge is amazing, a BMW v8 sounds like a Ferrari flat-plane crank v8 their respective sound from these engines are a world apart that no car enthusiast worth their salt would never mistake them.

I'll tell you one thing, I place a lot more weight on Car and Driver's reports than Footies' opinions.

I just realized one big thing, you accuse us all of being BMW fanboys but it is obvious that you are the biggest fanboy of them all except you are an Audi fanboy. The cars you love don't even have a forum with members that are enthusiastic enough for you to go to and talk Audis with, instead you have to come here and talk Audis with us BMW enthusiasts'. Shit, most BMW enthusiasts are more enthusiastic about Audis than Audi owners themselves.

Seems to me most Audi owners aren't even car guys, check out the lack of action in the RS4 and RS5 forums at Fortitude........ just a sad amount of activity:

http://forums.fourtitude.com/forumdi...?787-RS-4-(B7)

http://forums.fourtitude.com/forumdi...-amp-RS-4-(B8)

Originally Posted by footie

At no point EVER have I claimed the RS5 being a more entertaining drive, it's rwd that makes the M3 the superior driver's car. AWD claim to fame is it's easier to drive quickly (read 90% of us), it's more stable and has superior traction.

If AWD is superior than why didn't it get around the track quicker. You have said in many of your previous RS5 related posts that the RS5 will be superior to the M3 in the wet weather, I think this proves it is not.

[blue dragon]

Jesus, the amount of badge whores in here is astounding.

[Glop]

Originally Posted by blue dragon

Jesus, the amount of badge whores in here is astounding.

+1000

[Sedan_Clan]

Originally Posted by blue dragon

Jesus, the amount of badge whores in here is astounding.

Ummm...


....how so?

[shiggy]

Originally Posted by BMRLVR

I'll tell you one thing, I place a lot more weight on Car and Driver's reports than Footies' opinions.




I just realized one big thing, you accuse us all of being BMW fanboys but it is obvious that you are the biggest fanboy of them all except you are an Audi fanboy. The cars you love don't even have a forum with members that are enthusiastic enough for you to go to and talk Audis with, instead you have to come here and talk Audis with us BMW enthusiasts'. Shit, most BMW enthusiasts are more enthusiastic about Audis than Audi owners themselves.

did you know there are two Audi forum moderator's on this site???

Seems to me most Audi owners aren't even car guys, check out the lack of action in the RS4 and RS5 forums at Fortitude........ just a sad amount of activity:

thats why we have so many Audi fan boiz on here...its too lonely on their forums!!

http://forums.fourtitude.com/forumdi...?787-RS-4-(B7)

http://forums.fourtitude.com/forumdi...-amp-RS-4-(B8)


If AWD is superior than why didn't it get around the track quicker. You have said in many of your previous RS5 related posts that the RS5 will be superior to the M3 in the wet weather, I think this proves it is not.
Because of the terrible weight distribution and a Quattro system that is technically faltered in design....and its overweight!!

It's laughable when you have a few Audi fanboiz on here making false claims...putting down BMW...and when there is a rebuttal....they say things like: "what a bunch of badge whores"....too funny!

[Niro]

Originally Posted by ploo

Great episode. Thanks for posting - would have liked to see more out of the RS5. As much as I live my E92, it would have been nice to raise the bar in this segment now that we're nearing the tail end of E9x M3 production...and why have Audi's become such a poor price-performance value? To me, there's just not a compelling reason to choose any current Audi versus a comparable BMW, M car, or P car these days. Disappointing...

Totally agree: they should have had a few extra minutes on the RS5. Also, I don't think it's fair the way car programs make cornering comparisons based on the ability to drift. As much as I'd love to, I just don't drift my cars around corners in the 'real world'! - I'd rather be in a Quattro in the rain/ in suboptimal traction conditions, than in a RWD car!

[Niro]

Originally Posted by Z4@Phuket

Even F1 drivers can have more than 1 sec different in the same car, same driver
I don't make conclusion that BMW is better for 1 lap drive

Spot on! These stats should be more for fun, but people take them far too seriously

[Sedan_Clan]

Originally Posted by Niro

Also, I don't think it's fair the way car programs make cornering comparisons based on the ability to drift.

I haven't noticed a bias towards this. Yes, during the fun stuff, the drifting is added for effect. However, when they are really testing a car, I don't think this is really a factor.

[shiggy]

Originally Posted by Niro

Totally agree: they should have had a few extra minutes on the RS5. Also, I don't think it's fair the way car programs make cornering comparisons based on the ability to drift. As much as I'd love to, I just don't drift my cars around corners in the 'real world'! - I'd rather be in a Quattro in the rain/ in suboptimal traction conditions, than in a RWD car!

i dont think he was attempting to drift in the RS5...it just suffers from understeer.
the M3 drifted because he was going into the corners at a high rate of speed...hense the back end moving out.....but the beauty of the m3...its easy to control the drift and remain on the track. The RS5 plowed into the grass when pushed hard around the corner....