Single v. Relationship

[BMW F22]

wow so many posts I want to quote but it's much easier not to. I agree with Sharp that it's better to be loved and lost than to not love at all. THat's how we add colors to our lives. Which story would you rathere tell : I got in this relationship with this girl and had all these kinds of probs and we broke up OR I've been been in love??


I think the people that say "it's better being single" are only kidding themselves. In front of others they say that but deep inside they want to be in a relationship. Being single has its good and bad sides. Then comes the point where you've been single for too long, that's when it start to suck. Everyone should stay single for a while after a relationship to reminisce, reflect and learn from it. I know people who jump from one relationship to another and it grosses me out.

As for the sex part of it, Im also not the kind of guys that go for a one night stand. I'd rather "make love" than just "boning, banging, doing, fuckIn" a girl. To be honest I would prefer to be in a relationship much more than just dating or being single. Then again im picky as fuck when it comes to girls. LOL

[Scarabeo]

Been married for 30 years - you guys are a riot....met my wife in Spain while doing junior year abroad - Franco was still alive...haven't stopped travelling since then....

[KennyVendetta]

Originally Posted by Asiann

Some people need a sense of security that comes with having someone in your life. Besides you want to be single forever? There does come a time and for some it can be early, later or never!

Security in what? Do you mean financially? Or do we need someone to promise to love us forever and ever?

[Nikki]

Originally Posted by KennyVendetta

Security in what? Do you mean financially? Or do we need someone to promise to love us forever and ever?

Knowing that someone is always there for you no matter what.

[Sedan_Clan]

Originally Posted by KennyVendetta

Security in what? Do you mean financially? Or do we need someone to promise to love us forever and ever?

Are you really that naive?

[KennyVendetta]

Originally Posted by Sedan_Clan

Are you really that naive?

On the contrary....but I like how you are thinking. It is naive to get into a relationship based on a wish and promise.

I said "financially" in jest to stimulate conversation. There is no "security" in a relationship. Both partners have to work together to make it a success.

[Sedan_Clan]

Originally Posted by KennyVendetta

On the contrary....but I like how you are thinking. It is naive to get into a relationship based on a wish and promise.

I said "financially" in jest to stimulate conversation. There is no "security" in a relationship. Both partners have to work together to make it a success.

Who stated that wish and promise were the reasons to invest in a partnership? Good relationships are comprised of much more than the trivial. Furthermore, there does exist some facet of security in interpersonal relationships.

[KennyVendetta]

Originally Posted by Sedan_Clan

Who stated that wish and promise were the reasons to invest in a partnership? Good relationships are comprised of much more than the trivial. Furthermore, there does exist some facet of security in interpersonal relationships.

Nikki did...when she gave the hallmark answer...Knowing that someone will be there for you no matter what.

Belief in that is a wish. And if the the other person decides to modify or terminate the relationship (I assume we are referring to long term romantic relationships) the other person feels as if a promise has been broken.

Most people get into relationships out of fear of being alone, not because they want to better themselves and the other person.

[Nikki]

hallmark answer
like you think that one sentence entirely sums up what i think of a relationship?

[KennyVendetta]

Originally Posted by Nikki

hallmark answer
like you think that one sentence entirely sums up what i think of a relationship?

Nah....you were just answering the earlier question.

"Hallmark answer" was not a jibe. I hope that you don't take it that way.

But relationship does not equal security...that was my point.

[Sedan_Clan]

Originally Posted by KennyVendetta

Most people get into relationships out of fear of being alone, not because they want to better themselves and the other person.

"Most" is an over-generalization. Over-generalizing seems to be your modus operandi.

[KennyVendetta]

Originally Posted by Sedan_Clan

"Most" is an over-generalization. Over-generalizing seems to be your modus operandi.

Generalizing is ok when we talks about groups of people. I was trying not to get personal. So, why do you think people get involved into long term romantic relationships?

[deutschmann59]

If you guys are really that curious as to why we feel a need to be in relationships, perhaps you should further research human nature in general--epistemology and metaphysics, for example, are two branches of philosophical thought on this particular subject. Plato's Symposium or Plato's Phaedrus is a good place to start.

[KennyVendetta]

Originally Posted by sharp1183

Plato's Phaedrus is a good place to start.

I am checking on that now...gimme a few hours to digest it. I love philosophy!!

[Nikki]

And what's wrong with not wanting to be alone anyways?

[deutschmann59]

Originally Posted by KennyVendetta

I am checking on that now...gimme a few hours to digest it. I love philosophy!!

There are some "strange" ideas in this book, but there are some interesting points of views between the difference between friendship love and "romantic" love.

Plato's Symposium also goes into discussion about love and relationships. The Republic is also really interesting, which tells about the "perfect" society. As you can probably tell, I'm really into philosophy, too!

[KennyVendetta]

Originally Posted by Nikki

And what's wrong with not wanting to be alone anyways?

Nada.

But I think that societal pressure has a large part in long term romantic partnerships...especially in the South where I am from. Many women get married at a young age (17,18,19) because that's what their parents did. They barely have enough time to figure out who they are and what they want in life before everyone in the town is pestering them to get married and have kids.

[Nikki]

Originally Posted by KennyVendetta

Nada.

But I think that societal pressure has a large part in long term romantic partnerships...especially in the South where I am from. Many women get married at a young age (17,18,19) because that's what their parents did. They barely have enough time to figure out who they are and what they want in life before everyone in the town is pestering them to get married and have kids.

Mmm relationships and marriage are two different things. I have been in a relationship for 4 years but I dont see myself getting married until at least another 3 years.