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View Poll Results: Will you secretly DNA test your newborn w/o telling your wife?
YES 22 57.89%
NO 16 42.11%
Voters: 38. You may not vote on this poll

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      08-20-2010, 04:14 PM   #1
samwoo2go
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Must read for all Father and future Fathers.

I just saw a news report on the news regarding laws, especially in CA for child support and infidelity. This is some FUCKKKKKED UPPPP SHITTTTT

So apparently, you are liable for Child support in a divorce even if the kid is rejected to be yours by positive DNA evidence as long as the kid was conceived by your wife while you guys were married. Let that soak in for a minute there...

Think about it. Guy weds girl, after a year, girl gets pregnant, a child is born. 5 years later, guy finds out it wasn't his through accident. Would seem to be legit grounds for a divorce right. Fuck the cheating ho, and fuck the bastard child right...wait a minute, not so fast, you were married to the bitch before she got prego, that makes you the liable "father" regardless of DNA evidence.

The supposed "reasoning" behind this bullshit is that the state wants whole families first and foremost, which is basically saying "look you raised him for 5 years like it's your own, you can do it for another 13." Well I say fuck that and it should be my choice.

The only way to get out of it, is if you contest the infidelity within the first 2 years of the child's life. Which means that guys....DNA TESTING is essential for newborns. It's not really a trust thing IMO, it's just a fucked up legal situation if you don't.

DNA testing laws.
You can get it done without your spouse's consent, but it won't hold up in court.
To get 1 to hold up in court, you must have your wife's consent.
But I would def get it done secretly just to make sure. if it's yours, hooray, if not, then go about it as you wish, but at least you know.

Poll is will you secretly DNA test your newborn knowing this information now? Poll is private.
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      08-20-2010, 04:19 PM   #2
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Yep, that's pussified America for you.

There were a couple episodes on the Tom Leykis show about this, did you hear this there?
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      08-20-2010, 05:02 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DougLikesBMW View Post
Yep, that's pussified America for you.

There were a couple episodes on the Tom Leykis show about this, did you hear this there?
I would test.

Damn, haven't heard Tom Leykis since 97.1 (SoCal) dropped him. Is he still on the radio or do you have to stream him online now?
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      08-20-2010, 05:10 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kensta335 View Post
I would test.

Damn, haven't heard Tom Leykis since 97.1 (SoCal) dropped him. Is he still on the radio or do you have to stream him online now?
I don't live in Cali. I heard about him a while back on some forums so I looked him up on YouTube. Listened to almost every video that is associated with him on there.

I think he will go back on the radio in 2011/12 or something, can't remember which he said.
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      08-20-2010, 05:34 PM   #5
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last night while having dinner with some friends, one of my friends got a text. he learned that a friend of his found out that his girlfriend is preggos and it's not his kid. i know the situation sucks for the guy, but all i could think about at the time was how lucky he was to find out.
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      08-20-2010, 05:58 PM   #6
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another win out of my state
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      08-20-2010, 06:00 PM   #7
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with respect,
what human being with a heart,
would raise a child as his own for 5 years,
then disown him & not want to pay child support because it wasnt "genetically" his?
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      08-20-2010, 06:31 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fatjoez View Post
with respect,
what human being with a heart,
would raise a child as his own for 5 years,
then disown him & not want to pay child support because it wasnt "genetically" his?
That's what I was thinking. I would keep that child and raise him as my own. Something as stupid as genetics wouldn't stop me.

I love how men are always getting shafted in divorces, though. It's quite hilarious, if you ask me. Very rarely do I hear a story of a woman getting screwed in a divorce.
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      08-20-2010, 06:34 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fatjoez View Post
with respect,
what human being with a heart,
would raise a child as his own for 5 years,
then disown him & not want to pay child support because it wasnt "genetically" his?
I get what you're saying but that man should be able to choose if he wants to or not.
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      08-20-2010, 08:01 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fatjoez View Post
with respect,
what human being with a heart,
would raise a child as his own for 5 years,
then disown him & not want to pay child support because it wasnt "genetically" his?
Thankfully never been in this position (knock on wood) but what kind of woman cheats on her spouse, then forces him to raise someone else's child? What right does the woman have to force that financial and emotional burden upon an unsuspecting man? Instead of punishing the woman who has deliberately cheated, lied and conned, an innocent man will be penalized. Funny how our courts give thieves and con-men jail time but cheating wives get half. lol

I keep thinking of that Kanye song, Gold Digger.
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      08-20-2010, 08:42 PM   #11
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Just another reason not to move to Cali...
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      08-20-2010, 10:49 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BTM View Post
Just another reason not to get married
Fixed that for you buddy
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      08-20-2010, 10:54 PM   #13
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Originally Posted by DougLikesBMW View Post
Fixed that for you buddy




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      08-20-2010, 11:42 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fatjoez View Post
with respect,
what human being with a heart,
would raise a child as his own for 5 years,
then disown him & not want to pay child support because it wasnt "genetically" his?

While I agree, the "father" should still have a choice, as cruel and distorted as it may be

Californian lawmakers have some fucked up logic
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      08-21-2010, 02:05 PM   #15
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I wonder if that law exists in Canada.

But under these circumstances, I still wouldn't DNA test my child. While the judicial consequences might be fucked up should the kid not be mine, I'd be destroying the trust-aspect in my marriage by secretly doing a DNA test. To me, if I can't put the right ring on the right women and trust her on the legitimacy of my newborn, I deserved to get fucked over -- big time.
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      08-21-2010, 04:21 PM   #16
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^^still, even the people you trust most can do things that will break your trust and that are unheard of. there are sly people out there, who are very good at keeping up appearances and going to great lengths to hide dirt. if the test is a match, end of story and you never mention it again. however, if the child isnt yours, doesnt it seem like a more fundamental lack of trust for the wife to a) have an affair b) get pregnant c) not tell the husband about either and the chance that the child might not be his?

absolutely believe in a test secretly
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      08-21-2010, 06:12 PM   #17
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i really don't know much about family law, so forgive my ignorance... but will the actual father be responsible for child support also? Really think only the biological parents should be responsible following a divorce.
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      08-21-2010, 06:28 PM   #18
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Seriously messed up. Here I was thinking that the term "CHILD support" didn't leave much room for interpretation.
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      08-21-2010, 06:57 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jibaholic101 View Post
^^still, even the people you trust most can do things that will break your trust and that are unheard of. there are sly people out there, who are very good at keeping up appearances and going to great lengths to hide dirt. if the test is a match, end of story and you never mention it again. however, if the child isnt yours, doesnt it seem like a more fundamental lack of trust for the wife to a) have an affair b) get pregnant c) not tell the husband about either and the chance that the child might not be his?

absolutely believe in a test secretly
While it may be good security to invest in a secret DNA test, think about the after-effects. If I couldn't trust my wife on the legitimacy of my newborn child then, what can I trust her on? If an issue so large weathers me down to do a secret test, what about the daily things she does? What happens when she spends the night out with the girls? Do I secretly follow her?

I'd reason that following her and making sure she isn't cheating on me might be good security to invest for myself. In fact, following her around would reassure me 100% that my woman (be it girlfriend or wife) isn't/hasn't been sleeping around, more so than a secret DNA test would about my newborn child. But doing shady stuff like this opens up a can of worms. It also isn't the way to build relationships. It also means you haven't found the right woman who is comfortable enough to drop appearances and open-up.

I still stand firm with no DNA test if I were in that position. I'm sure if you had a child on the way, you would be celebrating about being a father rather than worrying if he's yours or not. And if you were to do the latter, I'd suspect that you already have doubts about the relationship. I've never heard of a new-father, whom is in a sound relationship, to secretly DNA test his child "just because" the judicial system might fuck him over years down the road.
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      08-21-2010, 08:13 PM   #20
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No shit! How about not being dumb enough to marry some skank where you would need to even worry about her cheating on you. Yeah, shit happens but come on now, if you're foolish enough to marry some chick who cheats on you and then 5 years later you find out the kids not yours, you just gonna turn off your feelings for the kid?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vanity View Post
While it may be good security to invest in a secret DNA test, think about the after-effects. If I couldn't trust my wife on the legitimacy of my newborn child then, what can I trust her on? If an issue so large weathers me down to do a secret test, what about the daily things she does? What happens when she spends the night out with the girls? Do I secretly follow her?

I'd reason that following her and making sure she isn't cheating on me might be good security to invest for myself. In fact, following her around would reassure me 100% that my woman (be it girlfriend or wife) isn't/hasn't been sleeping around, more so than a secret DNA test would about my newborn child. But doing shady stuff like this opens up a can of worms. It also isn't the way to build relationships. It also means you haven't found the right woman who is comfortable enough to drop appearances and open-up.

I still stand firm with no DNA test if I were in that position. I'm sure if you had a child on the way, you would be celebrating about being a father rather than worrying if he's yours or not. And if you were to do the latter, I'd suspect that you already have doubts about the relationship. I've never heard of a new-father, whom is in a sound relationship, to secretly DNA test his child "just because" the judicial system might fuck him over years down the road.
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      08-21-2010, 09:37 PM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fatjoez View Post
with respect,
what human being with a heart,
would raise a child as his own for 5 years,
then disown him & not want to pay child support because it wasnt "genetically" his?
+1

I have to agree.
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      08-21-2010, 09:40 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Vanity View Post
While it may be good security to invest in a secret DNA test, think about the after-effects. If I couldn't trust my wife on the legitimacy of my newborn child then, what can I trust her on? If an issue so large weathers me down to do a secret test, what about the daily things she does? What happens when she spends the night out with the girls? Do I secretly follow her?

I'd reason that following her and making sure she isn't cheating on me might be good security to invest for myself. In fact, following her around would reassure me 100% that my woman (be it girlfriend or wife) isn't/hasn't been sleeping around, more so than a secret DNA test would about my newborn child. But doing shady stuff like this opens up a can of worms. It also isn't the way to build relationships. It also means you haven't found the right woman who is comfortable enough to drop appearances and open-up.

I still stand firm with no DNA test if I were in that position. I'm sure if you had a child on the way, you would be celebrating about being a father rather than worrying if he's yours or not. And if you were to do the latter, I'd suspect that you already have doubts about the relationship. I've never heard of a new-father, whom is in a sound relationship, to secretly DNA test his child "just because" the judicial system might fuck him over years down the road.
Lol yeah fucking right. Speak for yourself. I'd kick that cheating whore straight to the curb.

Quote:
Originally Posted by SonnyJack View Post
No shit! How about not being dumb enough to marry some skank where you would need to even worry about her cheating on you. Yeah, shit happens but come on now, if you're foolish enough to marry some chick who cheats on you and then 5 years later you find out the kids not yours, you just gonna turn off your feelings for the kid?
I think while the 'opens a can of worms' or 'what can you trust her on then' arguments are somewhat valid, but it would be incredibly foolish to not protect yourself financially. I mean women have pulled this shit on men time and time again.

I hope you guys don't skip out on prenups, because you two sound like the kind of guys who would.

Better to be safe than sorry.
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