Engagement ring... What to do?

[ToothDoc]

What size rings do her friends have? Whatever they have, get .1 carat bigger.

[M_Six]

Marry a woman like my wife. Hates jewelry. Thinks it's a colossal waste of money. We both have plain (white gold) bands. Now if I could just convince her that the cats are a waste of money....

[firstkill]

I bought one recently

seems like the breaking point

less than 1 carat
1.0 to 1.49
1.5 to 2
2 and greater

the prices are exponentially higher.

blue nile will get you a ball park figure on the main stone. the little stones that go around the ring for decoration are very cheap.

options
1. buy fancy name brand, tiffany, HW, cartier
2. jewelry to copy a design from above of custom made
3. buy some premade one nad plug in a stone

fk

[kingofthedemo]

My friend got a really good deal on his wife's diamond on ebay, he bought the band locally and had it mounted from a local jeweler. I have bought fine gemstones on ebay and you can get some really good deals, obviously just make sure that you buy from a reputable seller with perfect feedback, that will include certification etc.

[Nkc]

Originally Posted by Nate4641

Luckily my girlfriend is small and has small hands so a smaller stone isn't a bad thing. And she isn't into big flashy stones anyways (or so she says).

Agreed. For me, the best thing I did was actually trying rings with my wife just for fun. I quickly found out that 1.5ct was too big on my wife and would seems extremely flashy. Try some sizes, see what seems big and what seems small. Then you can go decide on the other C's based on your budget. I went with a 1.23ct with decent C's which set me at around $10k usd.

Bluenile is great for comparing prices. Good luck.

[dreamingat30fps]

If I were ever to get married I would get her nothing but the best

[catherineanh]

engagement ring is a must !

[hudamang]

Rule #1: Never get engagement ring advice from a bunch of forumites! lol

If you don't follow rule #1, I'll offer my advice. If your BMW name is: "BringsMeWomen", it'll become: "Broke: Marriage to Wife" haha jk. Your girlfriend seems pretty chill. Doesn't want a 2 carat IF diamond to impress anyone. Congratulations on taking the big step towards marriage.

Ultimately, the ring is a symbol of your love to one another. I would go do some browsing with her and see if she what she actually prefers. My wife wears both her engagement ring and also her wedding band. Sometimes when we travel, she'll remove the engagement ring and just wear her band. Keeps it very versatile!

If after you do some browsing together, and she says she doesn't want an engagement ring, give her what she wants. Cliche but so true: "Happy wife = happy life".

[hudamang]

Check out costco's website for some pretty good diamond prices. It's weird to shop Costco but they have some hard to beat prices. Disclaimer: I didn't buy the engagement ring from them but I did find my wedding band there!

The cost of the engagement ring should be something that you are comfortable paying, while pleasing your fiancee. 4 Cs = Cut, Clarity, Color, Carat but the 5th C: "Cost" is also important.

Wedding is just the beginning so don't use all all your funds for the ring. Also, don't use financing if you don't need to. If you do, don't use a high interest rate one. Postpone the engagement and save more money if necessary. I know too many people who are already in the red and take a loan to get an engagement ring. Due to their poor financial management, the arguments start happening soon and that engagement ring after a few years is worth very little due to divorce.

[Kabrich]

Carat has very little to do with it.

Clarity, Cut and Color have far more to do with it.

Also, diamond might be fractured and filled which can only be seen under microscope, but that reduces the price considerably.

Quite frankly, quite a few females want the diamond as money in the bank when divorce comes up. I'd recommend a long talk about what is wanted more - a better honeymoon, a better apt/condo/house etc with the money or does she really have to have a big diamond? Will tell you a lot about the person.

Personally, not buying into Debeer's marketing, I think a gold band alone is classier today.

Also, assuming there is not an engagement ring in the family that your mother or grandmother might want to give as a family heirloom?

[Foxrus14]

Don't go any further down the color line than F... (D,E,F)= Colorless (G,H,I)= some yellow (J,K,L) = Yellow... Only stick to GIA certified diamonds. however, you can find an uncertified diamond and then get it GIA certified. You do pay extra for a GIA certification.

If you are going for a Princess, Elemerald, or asscher cut make sure the ratios are where they need to be and keep the table size bigger. The cut is what makes the stone show it's brilliance. Do not buy through Jareds or any mall store. find a diamond whole seller. I paid $23k for my wifes stone and for the same stone at any mall store or jareds it was at least $8k more. And what ever you do, do not buy Tiffany.... I got Tiffanie's Jewler to make the setting and mount my stone. D. Vatche' is the jewler in NYC. He makes all of their settings and did mine for $1000. At tiffanies the ring I bought would have been $40k+
the closest in price I could find was www blunile com I would look at that site and it will give you a good idea on price and walk you through the process.

Good luck... if you need any help PM some questions, I know far too much about diamonds mainly cause I bought them and did my research.

[Fifty3bags]

Originally Posted by Seminole

That's a good way to piss her off.

Who gives a shit what others think, get her what SHE wants. You should be focused on making her happy, not random people. My fiancée wanted a cushion cut solitaire with a ring diamonds on the band while I preferred a band with no diamonds and a center stone flanked by two side stones. In the end I got her what she wanted and she's really happy with it. It also turned out the type of ring she wanted was cheaper then the design I preferred. Same with a band only like your girlfriend wants. Since there are no large diamonds it will be significantly cheaper then a normal ring, luck you

Originally Posted by hudamang

Rule #1: Never get engagement ring advice from a bunch of forumites! lol

If you don't follow rule #1, I'll offer my advice. If your BMW name is: "BringsMeWomen", it'll become: "Broke: Marriage to Wife" haha jk. Your girlfriend seems pretty chill. Doesn't want a 2 carat IF diamond to impress anyone. Congratulations on taking the big step towards marriage.

Ultimately, the ring is a symbol of your love to one another. I would go do some browsing with her and see if she what she actually prefers. My wife wears both her engagement ring and also her wedding band. Sometimes when we travel, she'll remove the engagement ring and just wear her band. Keeps it very versatile!

If after you do some browsing together, and she says she doesn't want an engagement ring, give her what she wants. Cliche but so true: "Happy wife = happy life".

I'm going to agree with these guys. My fiance wanted an antique style ring with a single pear shaped diamond. Which, the pear shape isn't really the style now, so it took me a little longer to find what she wanted. But if you are both honest with each other and she really wants just the band then get that for her.

Also, it is a good idea to go shopping together. I really had no clue what I was doing when I was looking.

[Billup]

Originally Posted by hudamang

Rule #1: Never get engagement ring advice from a bunch of forumites! lol

If you don't follow rule #1, I'll offer my advice. If your BMW name is: "BringsMeWomen", it'll become: "Broke: Marriage to Wife" haha jk. Your girlfriend seems pretty chill. Doesn't want a 2 carat IF diamond to impress anyone. Congratulations on taking the big step towards marriage.

Ultimately, the ring is a symbol of your love to one another. I would go do some browsing with her and see if she what she actually prefers. My wife wears both her engagement ring and also her wedding band. Sometimes when we travel, she'll remove the engagement ring and just wear her band. Keeps it very versatile!

If after you do some browsing together, and she says she doesn't want an engagement ring, give her what she wants. Cliche but so true: "Happy wife = happy life".

+1, Touche.

[Fifty3bags]

Originally Posted by kscarrol

Just googled diamonds and got a few jewelers I'd never heard of. Ballpark a mid quality 1.5 carat diamond is likely a $10k++ purchase.

Yes, I agree with this statement. I went a different way than most do when I purchased my fiances ring. I found an ad for a lady selling a necklace in a local ad and it had the stone that I wanted for the center of the ring. Took it to the jeweler and looked at it, they had all the paperwork and I bought that. Cut off the stone from the rest of the necklace and gave the necklace as a gift. Then found a setting and mounted the stone into the setting and proposed with that.

It's a 1.41 carat pear (teardrop) shaped diamond, and the ring is worth double what I paid for the ring, wedding band and necklace. Some times you need to look outside the traditional jewelry stores.

[KingOfJericho]

Cut is what's going to give the stone its pop. Also, the larger the stone, the more you will need to focus on color and clarity because it will be far easier to see with the naked eye if there are large inclusions or bad color.

What I will say is that you should buy something that you will be proud of because you will be judged by what others see on her hand. Sorry to break it to you but if you cheap out, it's a negative reflection on you.

Get a GIA certified stone. People will poopoo it all day but it's worth it to be certain of the quality of the stone you're getting, given the money you'll be spending and how long it will be around.

My wife loathes traditional wedding rings with just the band and stone and wanted something with more pop. She found a design that she loved on the Harry Winston website so we printed a picture and had it made at a very reputable custom jeweler in the area (with slight variations to avoid trademark issues). Every surface that would be bare metal is encrusted with stones and the main stone is a 1.55 carats radiant cut. It's 201 stones total. She loves it and I take a lot of pride in the fact that I didn't just go and pick out something and hand it to her. We will never see another one like it.

This was the base design from HW:

[Nate4641]

Originally Posted by KingOfJericho

My wife loathes traditional wedding rings with just the band and stone and wanted something with more pop. She found a design that she loved on the Harry Winston website so we printed a picture and had it made at a very reputable custom jeweler in the area (with slight variations to avoid trademark issues). Every surface that would be bare metal is encrusted with stones and the main stone is a 1.55 carats radiant cut. It's 201 stones total. She loves it and I take a lot of pride in the fact that I didn't just go and pick out something and hand it to her. We will never see another one like it.

This was the base design from HW:

holy....that must have made a dent in your wallet. If not, know of any job openings?

[KingOfJericho]

Originally Posted by Nate4641

holy....that must have made a dent in your wallet. If not, know of any job openings?

Tiny stones really don't cost much but the price of a 1.5+ stone was quoted earlier in the thread. We were able to justify it by not having a real wedding. We were going to have to pay for it ourselves and would never come close to recouping that figure so we decided to spoil the shit out of ourselves instead of throwing a big party that is only really enjoyed by those attending and not the bride and groom themselves. We went on a no-holds-barred two week trip to Hawaii. On day three we got married on the beach on Kauai (Hanalei Bay) with our toes in the sand and a total of zero guests in attendance - only an official to marry us and a photographer. It was exactly what we wanted and we saved a boatload of money in the process. It was all planned months in advance, we didn't "elope".

[Billup]

Originally Posted by KingOfJericho

Tiny stones really don't cost much but the price of a 1.5+ stone was quoted earlier in the thread. We were able to justify it by not having a real wedding. We were going to have to pay for it ourselves and would never come close to recouping that figure so we decided to spoil the shit out of ourselves instead of throwing a big party that is only really enjoyed by those attending and not the bride and groom themselves. We went on a no-holds-barred trip to Hawaii. Got married on the beach in Kauai (Hanalei Bay) with our toes in the sand and a total of zero guests in attendance. Only an official to marry us and a photographer. It was exactly what we wanted and we saved a boatload of money in the process.

This is actually what my girlfriend and I are considering. We have no interest in throwing a bash for everyone else to have fun, we would rather invest in things for us to do together and enjoy the beginning of marriage before start to loathe each other.

Only difference is I will spoil her with this bad boy;

[BayMoWe335]

A rare (perfect) stone was the most important thing to me. You can find a 1.5 carat G S1 diamond at Walmart

I ended up getting an E VVS1 with the best cut and around 1.5 carat in a solitare setting since the diamond is so pimp. This is essentially a perfect diamond. Do the research on price...it was on the expensive side. Ultimately, I wanted the diamond to be extremely rare since for me, that's what diamonds are all about. My wife loved it. Salesmen will sell "bang for buck" and to me, that's just crap.

You can get a 3 carat huge rock for the price I paid for 1.5 carats, but for me, that wasn't the way to go. Purity, color, and cut are MUCH more important.

www.bluenile.com

Tiffany, Cartier, and Debeers are all nice, but even they don't sell much of the really high end stuff.

Absolutely must be GIA certified and insured. Ours is GIA and AGSL to verify cut.

[KingOfJericho]

Originally Posted by BayMoWe335

A rare (perfect) stone was the most important thing to me. You can find a 1.5 carat G S1 diamond at Walmart

I ended up getting an E VVS1 with the best cut and around 1.5 carat in a solitare setting since the diamond is so pimp. This is essentially a perfect diamond. Do the research on price...it was on the expensive side. Ultimately, I wanted the diamond to be extremely rare since for me, that's what diamonds are all about. My wife loved it. Salesmen will sell "bang for buck" and to me, that's just crap.

You can get a 3 carat huge rock for the price I paid for 1.5 carats, but for me, that wasn't the way to go. Purity, color, and cut are MUCH more important.

www.bluenile.com

Tiffany, Cartier, and Debeers are all nice, but even they don't sell much of the really high end stuff.

Absolutely must be GIA certified and insured. Ours is GIA and AGSL to verify cut.

You are really only impressing a jeweler with that stone. Nobody can see minor inclusions with the naked eye on a 1.5 carat stone so at that point only you, your wife, and a jeweler with a loop will ever know.

[Templar]

Originally Posted by kscarrol

Right, see my initial post... What is she expecting? You can trade off a larger size for a lower quality stone, etc... And my link was to a basic description of the four C's.

Sorry, I meant "meh" to the whole reputable jeweler part. Most, if not all, of the ones I went to had their own agenda when it came to selling engagement rings.

@Foxrus14 knows his stuff. Probably the best advice here in this thread.

As for the stone I got, it was F color, VS2 for clarity, very good cut, 1.5 carat diamond. Not best of the best, but you couldn't tell by looking at it unless you are a jeweler with a microscope.

[upstatedoc]

Originally Posted by M_Six

Now if I could just convince her that the cats are a waste of money....