Quote:
Originally Posted by hotrod2448
Of course there will be a few martyr parents who will tell you it's hard but, totally worth it and how much of a joy kids are and how it's the most fulfilling thing in life and they don't even miss their Porsche or vacations on tropical islands blah, blah, blah but, if you could look into their eyes you'd see they are dead inside. Don't fall into that trap.  |
I've seen many parents who say that, and they seem to fall into 1 of 2 categories.
Those who truly mean it, with every fiber of their being; you can usually tell by the way they talk about it. These are often the people how knew beyond a shadow of a doubt from the time they were a teen that they absolutely wanted kids.
Then there are those who say that, but you get the sense they are saying it out loud to try and convince themselves of it, more than they are trying to convince you of it. I know that look in their eye you are talking about. Those who always knew they definitely wanted kids, and never wavered from that, tend not to be in this category. People who had kids because they felt pressured by society/parents/culture or simply a fear of regret, they tend to be more in this category.
I guess the best advice is to pay attention to both groups of parents, cause you can learn from both of them. An honest self-assessment will tell you which group you are likely to fall into. My guess is, Carve already knows the answer.
"If you think you can, or if you've convinced yourself you can't, you are probably right." -Henry Ford.
Henry wasn't talking about having kids, but I think it applies just as well.
Good luck with your decision. Unlike accepting a job, or getting married, or even moving across the world, it is one decision you cannot really undo, if it turns out to be not what you expected.