This whole thing is realy really scary.
This can happen to any of us. Sometimes you can resolve these issues amicably and sometimes you can't. I would decide what I wanted and deal with the regional BMWNA rep directly.
Then think of what happens to the car after a buyback. There is the poor fool that buys this car from another dealer as a CPO or worse from a non BMW dealership off auction with no warranty at all. He suffers too. The title is not marked flood vehicle, it is now a CPO golden deal.
I feel for you and others that run into these dillemmas.