Problem solved. By the way if you even detail leather interiors READ THIS whole post! I found one of THE BEST DETAILING products I've ever used - in all seriousness. The shininess on all of my leather, seat and steering wheel, etc. have been COMPLETELY and easily restored to the factory appearance - very flat/matte.
This was not really a problem with the cleaning nor conditioning products. The good news is that a trio of products is not required at all. The essence of this problem is picking up the oily contaminants that do have dissolved dirt in them. Based on this post
I tried the Magic Eraser product. I used a bucket of very hot water, with just a bit of the strong LM cleaner added (probably not required, I bet water alone would have worked since the magic is truly in the Magic Eraser, not the cleaner/soap). The sponges supplied with the product from Detailers Domain simply do ZERO lifting up of any contaminants that the cleaner dissolves. Just as the post describes keep rinsing and lifting until the eraser wipes over your leather clean. You will probably begin disintegrating the eraser in just one pass over your entire interior. It will leave some small white balls of the eraser product all over. Fortunately a microfiber towel lifts those and removes any excess water really well (which you don't want sitting on your leather for a long time anyway).
The finish of my leather is so perfect now I don't even want to use a conditioner nor protectant but I will use one. I don't think the product choice here really matters. Just pick a decent one that does not leave a shiny finish (unless of course that is what you want).
Hats of to the fellow who made the post about his E46 M3 steering wheel and the fellow who referred him to Magic Eraser. There will ALWAYS be some of these in my regular cleaning/detailing supplies.