I don't understand what has happened to customer service in this country. Honestly, its not that hard to do your damn job. Be polite, willing to help, and do everything you can to make the customer feel special. I haven't had to take my car in for any services yet, but I swear if I am treated the way you are, I would A) Never buy a car from that dealership again, B) Never visit them again for service. I can't believe that guy would say "im not making any money on this". If anyone said that to me my response would be, "You may not have made money on this, but now you will never make money on anything from me." I don't know why people don't understand repeat business is the key to success.
Sorry, I don't know what dealership to go to. I have heard good and bad things about BMW of SF, Stevens Creek BMW, etc. I need to get an oil change, but thats about it. I will probably just go to Dinan and pay for it, so I don't have to worry about the shanageans you just described, I hope.