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      01-10-2013, 12:06 PM   #248
carve
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shah269 View Post
+1!
Same here, i cooked, i cleaned, i folded the clothes and paid for her education.... fuck i even paid for her fucktards friends wedding dress...and her fucktards kids xmass gifts!

And sure no man is perfect but dont' listen to that life time shit...no woman is perfect either. But good luck arguing that point...note not a single woman has said a fucking word in this thread! Why? Simple in their mind no matter how good the dude....shit you could give her a kidny and chew her food for her...and it's still your fault..in one way some way somehow it's your fault.
LOL- we should all hang out :P

Ditto on paying for her education, not to mention taking her on a year long trip around the world. She had a very low paying job for her education level, too (more education than me, making 1/3 as much). It was always frustrating because it basically made me less able to take risks in my career, and essentially required me to spend many more years of my life in an office. If she made more, we could retire sooner and have more recreation and travel opportunities. Towards the end she said money wasn't important and she intended to work forever, and my problem with her career choices was just that I was jealous she liked her job more than I liked mine. Well...wouldn't you know it...as soon as she's on her own, a decent paying job with retirement benefits and getting all the retirement money she could get from me suddenly became very high priorities for her. If only she realized all along she would be responsible for her own future one way or another there would've been less resentment. So glad I got out of the alimony! She quit her job for a while during the negotiations to stick me with all the bills though and to try to get more out of me.

She was living with her parents for a while and just got her own place. Unless she can find some other schmuck to take care of her, it's going to be a rude awakening for her when she realizes how much effort it takes to take care of the little things she took for granted before.

Quote:
And that fucking pisses me off! My x wife cheated on me...point blank the cunt cheated no me. You think other women would look down on her...ha ha FUCK and NO! My favorite line thus far has been "I'm sure you did something wrong for her to cheat on you." If that sentence does not hurt your head....you are seriously fucked up. ...
We DID do something wrong: we gave them all we could without setting boundaries on what is and is not acceptable behavior in the relationship, which made them lose respect for us. Next relationship, be just as giving, but make your needs clear and if she isn't willing to do her part, kick her to the curb. Pick a girl based on what she is, not what you want her to be. A partner and contributer is something I require, so now I typically only date seriously smart women who either already make decent money (from 60 to 300% of what I make), or are in school for careers with that kind of potential (some are a lot younger than me). I'm on a few online dating sites (try it- it's like shopping for women!) and I make that clear right on my profile. I say I give a lot, and expect a lot in return and I'm looking for a partner- not someone looking to be taken care of. Boundaries set before we even meet. It's a nice cunt-filter.

That's how you treat a woman, grimlock; with respect as an EQUAL. That means don't treat them like an object, but just as importantly don't put them on a pedestal and let them cross your boundaries. That's the only way you can have a respectful relationship. Give them what they need in a relationship, but have no qualms about GETTING what you need from them, too.

Right now, I need to be dating several women at once. I clearly explain why (and I do have legitimate reasons beyond the ridiculous amounts of mind-blowing sex I'm having) and you'd be surprised how many women respect that and will stay with you if you're honest about it. It's a fantastic situation- when they know they're not the only one, they actually compete for your attention! A really beautiful girl (looked like Emma Watson) who I had amazing chemistry with wasn't OK with it, and had a crap job, too. The old me would've dropped everything for that kind of chemistry and beauty, but I realized she doesn't meet my needs right now so I dropped her. In the future, when I'm ready for something exclusive, I'll give her a call and see how her career is going and maybe restart it. I think good guys are hard to find, and we're good guys, so we can have options like that. It's a very non-needy thing to do, and women respect that. They don't want some pussy who needs them- they want a guy with options who CHOOSES them above all the others.


Quote:
It's shit like that which started me to look at the ground at 125mph and thinking...hey how bad can it be?
I can't imagine how bad it would be if I had kids...fucking A that would be a head down dive into the ground from 14kft!
The thought crossed my mind, too, although I never seriously considered going through with it. I thought "is this all there is...another monotous day of giving all I can and not getting my needs met?" Life is precious though, so better to throw caution to the wind and see what you can make of it before you check out, which is exactly what I did. The thought never even crosses the most remote portions of my mind any more. I'm having an AMAZING time and I see so much potential for further growth and happiness

I'm not so sure about marriage anymore- nobody has a right to own my life, and when someone feels entiteled to you, they no longer have to put in an effort to keep you around- you're legally obligated. I'd have to be with someone for a very long time to have enough trust to do that again, and it would be with someone I don't want to be without.

Last edited by carve; 01-10-2013 at 01:19 PM.