Extremely sorry and disappointed to see this!
You and many others are wrong on one thing, that the car will never be the same! The car can be as good as new since there is only paint damage, the problem is going to be finding a shop that is willing and able to repair it properly.
I know the IND could make your car as good as or better than new, since I have seen their paint and bodywork abilities in person. I was proved wrong, because I too used to have the attitude that no paint repair could be done to factory quality. Now I am not suggesting that you take your car to Chicago for repair as the only option, find a shop in California that you know will do the job that you will be satisfied with, I am sure that shop exists, you need to do your research to make sure that the shop you use is a shop that is going to do the repair to your standards.
Again, I am extremely disheartened and sorry to see this and I hope it all gets made right!
2011 E90 M3 ZCP - Individual Moonstone/Individual Amarone Extended/Individual Piano Black With Inlay:LINK!!!
1994 Euro E36 M3 Sedan - Daytona Violet/Mulberry:LINK!!!