Can't really tell from your pics because of the reflections, but what color is the interior of your car? Is it black? It plays a pretty important role on how dark the tint looks when looking at the car from the outside.
If it's black interior, I think you'd be surprised how dark 35% will look on the car, contrasting very well with the white, but still looking classy and not too dark. I have 35% on my AW E92 (black interior) and it looks pretty dark from outside. Besides, you're technically still legal even though it appears to be darker. When I was in VA, to be legal, I had to be 35%. I did it and it looked dark enough, but not too dark. No trouble with cops.
It's all personal preference though.
'11 BMW E92 ///M3 - ZCP and DCT
'13 Toyota Tundra - 4x4 Platinum CrewMax, 5.7l iForce V8