I'm not married, but I'll say this - whatever decision you come to, make sure it is in your child's best interest. A nasty divorce can really have a negative effect on your daughter, so make sure that is taken into consideration.
Also, have you mentioned any of this to your wife? I assume she knows of your intention to divorce, at the least. After 19 years, you two must have some common understanding in order to come to a mutually beneficial agreement - I can't imagine that she could be so callous as to take every penny from you.
And if nothing else, thanks for this post. As others have said, it has taught me the importance of a pre-nup.